My Husband and I Are Stuck on Opposite Ends of the World Because of Coronavirus

My husband and I are trapped on opposite ends of the world due to the coronavirus

“I think it will make us stronger.

In our What It's Like series, we speak with people from a wide range of backgrounds about how their lives have changed as a result of the COVID-19 pandemic. For this installment we speak with Isabel Thomson-Officer, an Australian who has been separated from her husband for two years due to travel interruptions as a result of the coronavirus. She left for Australia in early March and what was supposed to be a two-week trip has become indefinite. Her husband, Jessie, is coping with the pandemic at their home in New York City, one of the places hardest hit by COVID-19 in the world. More than 16,000 kilometers away, they do not know when they will see each other again. Before this, the longest amount of time they had spent apart was three weeks.

Here, Thomson-Officer explains how COVID-19 has impacted their relationship, how she and her husband are managing being on opposite sides of the world with a 14-hour time difference, and what keeps her hopeful as she longs to go home. with the love of her life. (Her responses have been edited and condensed for clarity.)

ALFAZESADIK: Tell me how you ended up in Melbourne, Australia, while your husband, Jessie, is in Brooklyn.

I.T.O .: I am Australian and have been living in New York for the past six years. I came to Melbourne in early March for a friend's wedding and to visit my family. It was meant to be a two week trip. When I landed in Australia on March 7, I must admit I was struck by the strange obsession of some Australians with hoarding toilet paper. You couldn't buy it anywhere!

Ten days after my trip, the world changed very quickly. In mid-March, Australia issued a warning telling Australians not to travel abroad. At the same time, the pandemic began to take hold firmly in the United States, particularly in New York.

When did you realize that you couldn't leave Australia and meet your husband in New York City?

A week after my trip home, I attended my friend's wedding. It was beautiful and cool to see so many old friends that I hadn't seen in years. However, I was already starting to feel a bit nervous about the way things were going. It was starting to feel strange to be with so many people at the same time.

March 18 was when he got home. I had a flight back to New York scheduled for March 22nd and was beginning to think that I couldn't possibly catch it. After talking to my husband and family, I decided to fly back to New York on the night of March 18, so I panicked and bought a flight. But then I found out that the Australian government was asking Australians who were abroad to come back from abroad before it became more difficult to do so due to border closures.

After many tears and phone calls with Jessie, we agreed that the best thing would be for me to stay in Melbourne and watch the pandemic here. Things in New York were not looking good, everything was so uncertain and it is not a good time to travel. We both felt that he could also put others at risk if he did so.

I canceled my flight for that night. He was shattered and in utter disbelief at how much he had changed in just a few weeks. It was a difficult decision but ultimately the smartest we could make.

My biggest fear is that Jessie and I won't be able to see each other for a while. If he knew we would meet in June I think he would make it more manageable as he could set a time frame. Not knowing when we will see each other fills us with great dread.

How does it feel to be in Australia during the pandemic?

I am fortunate to have my parents here and a place to stay, for which I am very grateful. Our government acted quite early. I am proud that Australia has been able to put politics aside and hear sound medical and scientific advice on the best steps to take to combat the virus.

Except for a few bad apples and fights over toilet paper, Australians in general have shown their true colors of "fellowship". This country has gone from wildfires to floods to a pandemic, and they are fighting it with their heads held high. It has been amazing to see everyone come together through multiple crises and care for their fellow Australians.

Australia offers its citizens universal health care, so I am not afraid to pay for health care if I need it. We are much more concerned about Jessie contracting the virus, as she lives at the epicenter of the global outbreak.

She has stayed home and only left for essential shopping when she has to. He has a strict regimen when he enters and leaves the apartment, which includes cleaning all hard surfaces and shopping with disinfectant. It sounds extreme, but you can't afford to take chances. At the beginning of April, my mother and I sent her a bunch of masks that we made for her. He's an artist, so he has some spare masks too.

How do you feel about your husband being in one of the hardest hit cities in the world right now?

If Jessie got sick, I would go crazy with worry knowing that there is so little I can do for her from Australia. I wish it wasn't there, but it is. He is a born and raised New Yorker. He's tough and he's been through a lot. I'm sure he will get over this too.

What has it been like to navigate a sudden long distance marriage?

It has been a great challenge, I am not going to lie. However, I also realize that others have it much worse than we do. We both have our health and our supportive family, so it could be a lot worse. Fortunately, most of the people in our immediate circle are pretty healthy so far.

The biggest challenge is not being able to be physically close to the person you love. You don't realize how much you miss the sensation of touch and human connection until it is taken away from you.

How are you adjusting to not being together during this crisis?

Thank goodness for technology is all I can say! We talk several times a day on WhatsApp, Whereby or Zoom. We have a 14 hour time difference at the moment. Our two sleep schedules are everywhere. I have been working remotely for my job in New York from 9 a.m. at 5 p.m. ET, which means I often work all night and finish around 5 or 6 a.m. in Australia. Jessie is a night owl anyway so she's kind of settled